Don't be sorry because I'M NOT!

I went to my doctor for my 6 (really 7) week check up this week. I informed her that Austin does, in fact, have Down syndrome. I saw her about a week ½ after my C-Section, but we didn’t know the results of the Karyotype test yet. My doctor is very compassionate by nature. Naturally, she told me she was “sorry” and said that she’s sure he’ll bring me many blessings. I replied to her that he already has! I could tell she felt sorry for me and as much as I don’t like that, I know her heart was in the right place. I will always be thankful to Dr. C for delivering my precious baby safely.

As much as hearing “I’m sorry” bothers me, I have to remind myself that some people just aren’t aware of all the advances that have been made regarding Down syndrome. Some people just don’t know what to say! Down syndrome has so many stereotypes and it isn’t what it was 20 years ago. I’m confident that my son will continue to thrive. He WILL do everything that other kids do. It might take him a little longer to do certain things and it might not…but HE WILL do them.

“Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.”
- Hebrews 11:1

If you’re a new parent and have a child with Down syndrome, I would like to encourage you to purchase the book Babies with Down Syndrome: A New Parents' Guide. It sounds like one of those “encyclopedia “ type books, but NOT! I’ve gotten so much out it. It gives you information from birth to age 5. It’s definitely a great resource to have! Just a thought ;-)

I’ll leave you with this beautiful poem by Emily Perl Kingsley. I’m sure a lot of you have read it before, but it never gets old. The words speak so true.


WELCOME TO HOLLAND
by: Emily Perl Kingsley

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.